Within the first minute of SNL’s viral spoof of the Barbie movie’s song “I’m Just Ken,” a bleached and toned Pete Davidson softly croons about his purchase of a 277-foot Staten Island Ferry: “When I’m high, I do things like call up Colin Jost and say, ‘Homey, we should buy a boat.’”
It is one of the many references the comedians have made to their acquisition of the former John F. Kennedy Staten Island Ferry vessel for $280,100 in 2022 — a non-operational, 61-year-old ship they planned to transform into an event space with restaurants, bars, hotel rooms and a concert venue.
But since then, the massive ferry has become an embarrassing white elephant, moored to a pier they rent out at Staten Island’s Caddell Dry Dock and Repair. Meanwhile, Jost and Davidson have been sued for failure to pay a law firm involved in the ferry’s dockage and towing contracts.”
“Help our family,” joked Scarlett Johansson, Jost’s wife, about starting a GoFundMe when asked about his purchase last year.
Now, they have an option to offload their slowly sinking ship: the state wants to send it to a watery grave — as a home for sea life that could make it the first large vessel in New York to be reborn underwater as an artificial reef.
The state official in charge of creating habitats for underwater creatures told THE CITY in no uncertain terms: He wants the ferry.
Marine biologist and diver Chris LaPorta has spent the last 26 years working as the sole coordinator for the state Department of Conservation’s artificial reef program, where he spends much of his time chasing leads on vessels that would make good reefs.
And he’s got his eyes on the John F. Kennedy.
Unlike other states that sink boats to create habitat, New York has yet to land a large vessel for reefing. States like New Jersey and Maryland have sunken retired naval crafts, which LaPorta called the “jewel in the crown” of artificial reefs.
“Something like a Staten Island Ferry would be approaching a naval vessel,” he said.
“They are gorgeous. They would make fine habitat, for sure,” he added. “Think about the iconic look on the bottom for divers because you’ve got that beautiful blazing orange and the navy blue. It would be something.”
Should New York obtain a large vessel of its own to sink, LaPorta would deposit it in one of the designated reef zones that create complex habitats which otherwise do not exist on the flat, sandy bottoms of New York waters.
LaPorta took a tour of the John F. Kennedy when it went up for auction.
Bill Cadden wanted it, too. He is a retired marine engineer who founded the nonprofit Long Island Reef Society to create artificial reefs out of concrete, rock or steel objects. He is often in touch with LaPorta at the DEC, and both men tap into their decades in the marine industry to source for reefing.
“I knew that the Kennedy was going to be coming out of service because they were building three new boats down in Florida,” Cadden said. “When the new boats started rolling in, the Kennedy, being the last of her class, was going to be on the chopping block.”
But they lost out to the pair of entertainers in the public auction.
“That’s where Mr. Davidson and company came into the picture,” Cadden said. “They had the winning bid.”
Sea Creatures and Seafarers
Two groups benefit from artificial reefs: underwater species and humans who take an interest in them.
The Kennedy’s large size, with the capacity to hold 3,500 passengers, would allow for currents and tides to flow through it, providing places for fish to swim in and hide from predators, Cadden explained. Its steel structure also means it has staying power to stick around for a long time.
Carl Lobue, senior marine scientist at The Nature Conservancy in New York who also does work on local artificial reefs, said the areas around man-made habitats are lively.
“We’ve taken some underwater videos of these areas, and they’re really full of different critters,“ he said. “It’s quite a diverse amount of marine life, from the little anemones that live on the structures, to the little crabs, shrimp and all of the fish.”
Artificial reefs also boost the “economic engine” that fishing is in the New York and New Jersey area by creating new spots for fishermen to find game, according to Lobue.
“I think it would become a destination for people and marine life,” he said about the Kennedy.
Most of New York’s ocean bottom is a marine life “desert,” without rock reefs and structures for certain species to cling to. According to Cadden, “The only place where there’s structure for marine life, for fish and other critters, is from vessels that have been sunk or material that has been put down for that purpose
Buyer’s Remorse
For many, an impulse purchase entails a late-night fast food order, but for the two Staten Islanders who struck big performing on SNL, it was a 2,100-ton steel vessel.
Now, the pair apparently has buyer’s remorse, shown through self-deprecating humor. (Neither Jost nor Davidson’s representatives responded to THE CITY’s inquiries about their future plans for the ferry.)
“This is why idiots should not be allowed to do things,” Jost said on Late Night with Seth Meyers less than a year after the purchase.
“In case you’re wondering why I had to do a show in Saudi Arabia, we’re losing millions on this ferry,” Davidson said on SNL five months ago, referencing his much-criticized performance at the Riyadh Comedy Festival.
“You watch SNL every so often, he’ll be joking, ‘Here, take my boat,’” Cadden told THE CITY about Jost.
In fact, the japes about their “mistake” have become so common, Lobue at the Nature Conservancy has started collecting them.
“Every time it gets mentioned on Saturday Night Live as a little side joke, I’m constantly clipping the videos and sending them to the artificial reef unit at DEC,” he said.
Jost and Davidson are far from the first people to purchase a vessel with a dream but without any seafaring expertise. There have been a series of unsuccessful endeavors to repurpose old ferries in New York — like the Prudence Ferry purchased over a decade ago by the Long Island City-based company Plaxall with the idea of turning it into a floating beer garden. Cadden will now sink that ship for a reef in June, as previously reported by THE CITY.
“Every single vessel was bought with a fantastic idea of reuse, but bought by someone who is not in the marine business,” Cadden said. “Sounds good on paper, but putting it into practice is going to be very, very expensive.”
Cadden estimated the cost of Jost and Davidson’s not-yet-realized plans.
“You could probably add two zeros to the number that they paid,” he told THE CITY, “then maybe double it, between what it’s going to cost them to upgrade and make the vessel compliant, and find a place to berth it.”
LaPorta underscored the easiest way to stop the cash flow: let the boat flood.
“I always have my eyes out, and if there’s any opportunity, I certainly will be in communication with them,” he said.
Even selling it for scrap metal wouldn’t be a great option, Cadden said; the costs of transporting and cutting it up would likely outweigh the value of the material.
Lobue, for his part, said he recognizes Jost and Davidson’s vision for the Kennedy and what it symbolizes for the borough they hail from.
But ultimately, he thinks they may be falling victim to a literal sunk-cost fallacy: not wanting to give up on something you’ve already put time and money into.
As a scientist, Lobue put it in entomological terms, likening them to a type of wasp that must dig a hole down to the water line to lay eggs.
“At some point in time, the wasp will realize, ‘I started digging in the wrong spot,’” he said. But the wasp won’t change course and “will invariably dig one hole.”
“They will never give up, and if they don’t reach water, they’ll just die digging. I do think that it’s human nature to do something like that, as well.”
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